Have there been times in your life when you have felt disappointed with people? And you have experienced the emotion of anger or helplessness.
So every time we experience hurt we go through certain stages. And today I am going to talk about five stages that we go through as we move through the cycle of hurt.
Stage # 1 happens when you want people to be in a particular way and they are not. So when people are not the way we want them to be it leads us to Stage # 2 in the cycle of hurt and this is when you experience a lot of negative emotions.
The emotions could be anger, anxiety, helplessness, irritation, frustration, so it creates a huge overwhelm of emotions. The closer the relationships, the more the emotions that you experience.
Once this stage passes we move to Stage # 3. Which is when we start to make sense of these emotions. And the way we do it is by labelling the other person. These labels start to become your reality and your impression and perception of the other person.
So then we more to Stage # 4 where we start to communicate with the person from the label that we have attached to the person. So now I no longer see the person for who he or she is but I see the person through the label or the image that I have created in my mind about that person.
This leads to Stage # 5 and this is the stage of emotional war rather than any kind of healthy communication. The interesting part about an emotional war, is that it actually becomes the very relationship with that person. Any kind of healthy communication breaks down at this point.
Remember the beginning point of the cycle of hurt is when we are not able to accept people for who they are. So what are you going to do today to stop yourself from getting into the cycle of hurt. Because remember it’s your decision, it’s in your control and its your choice.